We often minimize our own goodness.
We assume others are more creative, more compassionate, more wise.
Recently, during a pastoral visit in prison, I sat with J—as I’ve done many times before. His life story is the hardest I’ve ever heard: relentless abuse, trauma, and loss. Yet somehow, he’s emerged transformed.
Still, he’s in a dark place.
He’s tired. Tired of rebuilding after each depression.
He knows he’s resilient, but it’s getting harder to keep going.
I look J in the eyes, honoring his deep pain, and say:
J, you make a difference in this hell-realm of prison.
You’re a refuge—because you value listening, care, and friendship.
You underestimate your impact.
But your kindness, your awareness, your respectful presence—it changes people.
Even when you feel stuck in the dark, you’re a light for others.
Tears come to his eyes.
His own goodness revealed.
J inspires me.
He’s a steady, caring presence in a place filled with fear and anger.
His very essence—what he sees as “unworthy”—brings calm and connection.
And when that goodness is reflected back to him, he weeps.
He thinks it’s other people doing good work—not him.
This is a humble path we walk.
Aggrandizing our impact is harmful.
But minimizing it is also harmful.
If you do the work—if you’re present, compassionate, real—you make a difference.
You might never see it.
You might never know.
But you do.
This work is messy and imperfect.
You’ll screw up (we all do!).
But when your intention is love and connection, something powerful happens.
Your impact doesn’t come from what you do—it comes from who you are.
From how you carry yourself.
From how you navigate this complicated world with heart.
So please—keep doing the work.
Even when it’s hard.
Especially when it’s hard.
We need it now more than ever.
YOu are a light for other people.