Yesterday, I spent two hours in my yard. I made new flower beds last fall, using compost and cardboard. I worked in one bed: digging out dandelions (how do they still exist in no-light conditions?), cleaning grass from edges, and loosening soil. It felt good to place my hands in dirt; to connect with the earth. It also felt good to be outside: to hear birdsong and talk with neighbors.
I began my “Truth Tuesday” series as an antidote to on-the-surface sharing within social media. If we only see people’s public faces—faces that appear happy, well-adjusted, and successful—we miss the real story, because we all struggle. Just as we feel love, happiness, and excitement, we equally feel sadness, doubt, and fear. None of us has all our sh&t together, and it’s helpful to hear this from other people. Our imperfections connect us as much as our successes.
Recently, at the farmer’s market, I felt anxious: As I talked with my favorite farmer while he weighed my produce, I noticed a line forming behind me, people whose body language indicated “hurry up.” Within moments, I was absent from the lively conversation. I was in exit mode, and then I felt crabby. Upon reflection, I assumed this response came from my role as peacemaker: wanting everyone to be happy. But digging deeper, I realize my reaction came from a place of fear: not wanting to be wrong or make a mistake—not wanting attention in a negative way.